Want to know if a guy likes you? The key lies within translating what he’s saying. To help simplify things, we’ve compiled a list of what he says and what he really means.
By Lisa Sussman , iVillage.com
There’s an old joke about a wife who nags her husband, “Tell me how you feel.” Finally, the husband blurts, “I feel…I feel…like watching television.”
The awful truth is, most men have no idea how they feel at any given time. Studies show that men use language to establish difference, separateness and independence (exactly the opposite of women, who talk to connect). So demanding that he talk to you is guaranteed to make him squirm and start rambling about whether new Cheerios really are improved.
RELATED: 9 Signs He’s Not over His Ex
Here are the answers and explanations to his biggest verbal ‘Huhs?’ (you’ll be speaking like a native in no time). Take the cues from the following sections, so that you and your man can finally understand each other:
What He Says When You’re Dating
He says: So maybe we could get together or something?
He means: I think you’re really hot and want to ask you out, but I’m too chicken to say so
He says: Nothing about seeing you again
He means: His mojo wasn’t rising
He says: You’re a really good person
He means: You’ll never see him again
He says: Let’s be friends
He means: You’re not my type, but could you set me up with your hot friend?
He says: I’ll call you
He means: I really mean to call but I’m scared you’ll say yes, we’ll go out and it will be a letdown. Or worse, what if it’s not? Do I want to go through all the hassle of dating? Get married? Have kids? Aaahhhh!
He says: We’re dating
He means: We’ve spent at least five nights together, at least one of which has ended in sexual contact. But in no way are we exclusive
He says: We’re seeing each other
He means: It’s down to you and one other woman
He says: I think we should date exclusively
He means: I’m scared that if I don’t make things more permanent, you’ll date someone else
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What He Says When He’s Serious
He says: I really like you
He means: I think I am falling in love but if I say that word, there is no going back
He says: “Girlfriend” and he’s not doing a Ru Paul imitation
He means: You’ve made him breakfast, he fixed your car and his buddies aren’t allowed to come on to you
He says: Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine
He means: God, I know you want to talk about my day and all my interrelationships with my colleagues and boss and the guy who drives my bus, but I am at home now and I just want to drink 10 beers, eat a bag of chips for dinner and zone out
He says: Maybe we need to slow down
He means: Maybe you need to slow down
He says: I don’t know what I want
He means: I don’t want you
He says: I need some space
He means: I’m about this close to dumping you but I haven’t worked up the nerve yet
He says: You’re an amazing woman
He means: You’re an amazing woman
He says: I love you
He means: You make me incredibly happy whenever we are together. I think you may be The One.
What He Hears When You Speak
Men don’t always hear everything you’re saying, which means he’s not always getting your message…
You say (after being introduced): Do you know this band?
He hears: I want you now
You say: What do you do?
He hears: Are you making enough money to make you marriage material?
You say: My ex is a crazy stalker who won’t stop calling me. He scares me.
He hears: I’m still in love with my ex
You say: What are we doing Saturday night?
He hears: I want all your time for the rest of your life
You say (after making love): That was really nice
He hears: That was the best sex of my life. Let’s do it again!
RELATED: Is Sex More Important Than Love?
Top Lies He’ll Tell You
Be wary, if he says any of the following to you:
- But I tried to call
- I didn’t get the message
- I didn’t notice what she looked like
- Sex isn’t the most important thing
- I’ll be careful
- We’ll talk about it later
- I’m not mad
- I could fall in love with you in a minute (wait a minute and ask him how he feels now)
Excerpted from Over 100 Things Women Should Know about Men
Get more tips on how to understand and talk to your guy at iVillage.com.
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.