Last Night’s Crowned

I almost (on purpose) missed last night’s Crowned! Came in to the episode 20 minutes late, but alas, I had missed nothing. By the time I tuned in, the ladies had to get on a soapbox (um, literally) and engage random people about a certain topic of interest. At a mall. Weirdest competition ever. (Who comes up with these?) Each team picked a platform to talk about, which included gems like “Does plastic surgery make you perfect?” “Do blondes have more fun?” and “Is body art sexy?” Fun and awesome in kind of a mind numbing, horrific way.

Sample awesome dialogue:
“Who wants a hug? Anybody? Anybody?”

The episode had all the makings of a great Miss Teen South Carolina speech, as in, such as, and therefore. And was something wrong with my TV, or did Shanna’s eyelashes look like two small rodents? (I’m all for fake lashes, but those suckers were too big!). Graceful looser award goes to Angela and Tenia! Who scampered off the stage in their ill-fitting lime-colored dresses after they were cut from the show, later spending some time backstage decrying the unfairness of the judges. But what was up with Shanna’s voice kind of cracking up like she was about to cry? Did you notice that? She was shocked! Shocked I tell you! “They’re not going to humiliate me like that” said Angela. Uh, Ang, darling? You did a pretty damn good job of doing that on your own. By participating on the show.

Uh, who let the crazy out. Anybody? Anybody?

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.


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