Recap: American Idol (Elimination Show)

By Jen Smith


We all know American Idol is one big popularity contest. Sometimes the right person wins (Kelly Clarkson) and sometimes the winners fade into oblivion (where is Taylor Hicks, anyway?). Tonight will surely be no different, as America loves to vote the wrong way.

The top 6 perform Phantom’s “All I Ask of You,” with Andrew Lloyd Webber playing the piano, pretending not to notice the poor attempts at harmony. Is Jason even singing?
The hot topic of the night is Brooke’s blunder, which, now that I think about it, probably got her some sympathy votes. Webber says Brooke is talented, but then makes fun of Jason by calling his song choice “curious.” I think I like this man now… even if he does remind me of that creepy uncle who makes you show him your trophy collection and asks if he can hold one.

The music video of the week is pimping a Ford Fusion by having the kids rock out to “Tainted Love.” They all look like post-apocalyptic vampires in their leather and big hair, except for Muppet, who just threw on a flannel shirt and called himself ghetto. And now, for the results. Dim the lights.

Ryan brings out the two Davids first. Muppet talks about changing up the song’s arrangement, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying over his weird breathing. It sounded like he was a cancer patient who got onto American Idol thanks to the Make-a-Wish Foundation. However, they’re both safe. Syesha and Brooke are up next. They both ramble for a while, but eventually Brooke is sent back to the safety of the couches, while Syesha is forced to sit/stand on the weird stools for the bottom two. Carly and Jason are up next. Naturally, we all presume Jason’s doomed. But, wait! America votes for the ones without talent! I forgot. This means that Carly is in the bottom two, naturally.

Carly and Syesha both sing their songs. Syesha bores me again but Carly brings the house down. Contrarily, Carly is sent packing. She seems gracious enough. I wonder if she’ll get another record contract. Next week is Neil Diamond week. Oh joy of joys.

[See what Kelly Clarkson is up to now.]

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