‘Survivor’ Castaway Interview: Randy Bailey

Randy Bailey might be one of the most misunderstood players in “Survivor” history. In Gabon he was portrayed as an angry, old hermit when he was actually forging lasting friendships with Corinne Kaplan, Charlie Herschel, Matty Whitmore, and others.

In last night’s episode, Randy was shown as a contributing member of his tribe. He attempted to feed his fellow Villains, offering the clam he’d found to everyone in the shelter. It was only when he was alone with the camera that he would show his true disdain for his tribe mates.

Fortunately for us, Randy also shows his disdain during exit interviews. I had a chance to chat with Randy the morning after he was voted out of “Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains” and get his no-holds-barred thoughts on Coach’s touching tribute, Boston Rob’s leadership style, and Russell’s machete-hiding antics.

Gordon Holmes: Randy…too soon.
Randy Bailey:
Tell me about it.
Gordon: So, tell me. What happened out there? Were you having trouble making inroads with the rest of the tribe?
Randy: I had some friends in our tribe from before we even started. Me, Tyson, and Coach…I knew almost everybody. But, it’s the oldest story known to man, (slang for female body parts deleted) rule.
Gordon: I’m not going to debate that policy.
Randy: I can live with it. I have to live with it.

Gordon: The Villains tribe has been having trouble getting things done around camp. It seems like Boston Rob is the only one working. Is that an accurate portrayal?
The people working; Boston Rob, Tyson, Coach, and myself put the shelters, and I said “shelters,” together on our own. The girls…Sandra and Jerri worked. The three girls Danielle, Parvati, and Courtney don’t do anything except work on their sun tan. Boston Rob was not working any harder than the other people that I mentioned. He was just frustrated because people…I mean…we’re not Amber. We’re not going to just say, “You’re right, King Rob.”

Gordon: How did the tribe feel about Russell? Were there any clues to the depths to which he would stoop?
No, we had not seen one second of season nineteen, so we had no clue what a dirt bag he was. We’d be working around camp and ten minutes later we’d be like, “Where’s Russell?” And Russell would be off making deals with girls or looking for idols in the same places where he found them in season nineteen. We figured out pretty quickly that he was up to something, but we didn’t know to what extent. If we’d watched fifteen minutes of the first episode of season nineteen you’d be talking to him right now instead of me.

Gordon: Was there any idea that he was responsible for the missing machete?
No, I just thought it was misplaced. The machete disappearing had nothing to do with me being voted off. Russell hiding the machete is just Russell’s way of getting more air time.
Gordon: Is that a line you wouldn’t cross, or is all fair in love and “Survivor?”
Randy: All’s fair in the game now. Eight, nine, ten years ago in Borneo, Australia, the first Africa that’s not the way the game was played. I’d never do something like that. It was frustrating when they accused me of it, but I told them several times I didn’t do it. I have friends left in the game and I don’t want them to starve to death. And they’d just kept bringing it up. Sandra and Danielle were like, “C’mon and tell us where it is, Randy.” And I’m just like, “Shut up.”
Gordon: (Laughs)
Randy: But the machete had nothing to do with me being voted out. It just gave Russell some more air time.

Gordon: Coach gave a very passionate speech on your behalf. Did you have any idea that Coach’s emotions ran so deep?
Yeah, watching that I hit the pause button. I was touched, it brought tears to my eyes. Coach and I have been good friends since and I didn’t doubt him for a second. I knew he was fighting for me, but I liked that scene.
Gordon: Do you know if Coach has decided what he’s going to do with the Oscar he’s sure to pick up for Best Passionate Speech?
Randy: I don’t know, I hope if there’s any money involved that he splits it with me. But that wasn’t acting, Coach is a loyal guy. And believe it or not, I think his stories are for the most part true. I’m a Coach fan.
Gordon: Did you get any poetry when you were out there?
Randy: (Laughs) No, he didn’t read us any poetry, just gave us bedtime stories. And that wasn’t Coach, that was Boston Rob saying, “Tell us another story.”
Gordon: Do you think Boston Rob was doing that so he could play Coach off as a fool later?
Randy: Probably not. I’ve got my issues with Boston Rob, but I think we were just killing time and Coach’s stories are entertaining and funny. And when you’re lying in a hut with a bunch of morons you’ll do anything to pass the time.

Gordon: Now I was warned beforehand that you were grossing people out earlier. And frankly I’m a little disappointed that this interview has been relatively free of gross-out moments.
I’ve been under the weather since my trip to the South Pacific. And, I went into some detail before. So, I’ve been told not to tell you about my massive diarrhea.
Gordon: Last time we spoke you went into detail about the “Diamond-hard rock pellets” that were covering your colon in Gabon.
Randy: This was the exact opposite of that.

Gordon: Did you and Sugar have a chance to patch things up at the Ponderosa?
There’s nothing to patch up. We’re just two different people. She was as cordial to me as I was to her. The last thing you want to do when you come out of a game like this is to continue it.

Gordon: Alright, let’s do some word association.
Oh no, you’re the word-association guy. I told myself for two weeks that I was going to prep for this, but I’m going in totally unprepared.
Gordon: I have faith in you. Let’s start with Sandra.
Randy: Floater.
Gordon: Courtney?
Randy: Caustic.
Gordon: James?
Randy: Simple.
Gordon: The bro-mance between Boston Rob and Jeff Probst?
Randy: Nauseating.
Gordon: Jerri?
Randy: Surprisingly fun.
Gordon: Coach?
Randy: Friend.
Gordon: Russell?
Randy: Midget.
Gordon: See, that wasn’t so bad.
Randy: You didn’t give me Rob! That was the one I practiced on.
Gordon: OK, Boston Rob?
Randy: (Expletive deleted)

Gordon: Last night after you were voted out you took the Villains buff off of your head and threw it into the fire. What motivated you to do that?
Actually, there were many meanings behind that. If you see the clip of us walking to tribal council I’m not even wearing a buff. I got in trouble for not wearing a buff, so they scrambled to find me one. And the producers lecture me, “Take care of these buffs cause we don’t have that many of them.”  So, it seemed like the thing to do to throw it in the fire. And then it has the symbolism to say, “To hell with this, to hell with this tribe, to hell with this game.”

More “Survivor” Fun: Check out my Episode Three Recap and the latest blogs from “Survivor: The Amazon” winner Jenna Morasca.

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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