Victor & Vivian Have The Best Wedding Of Their Lives
Victor (John Aniston) and Vivian’s (Louise Sorel) wedding on ‘Days of Our Lives‘ was the best intentionally funny soap episode in quite a long time. The episode was full of both high and low brow humor that was as funny as NBC’s Thursday night comedy line-up.
Here are the things that made laugh hard:
Vivian’s Black Widow Dress. Vivian is the opposite of subtle, so her black dress with the red waist that screamed “poisonous spider” and weird little hat was the perfect bridal look. It mixed evil and crazy with a little bit of aging drag queen. I love it when soap characters end up wearing wildly inappropriate wedding dresses. This was not quite Lucy Coe’s (Lynn Herring) marrying Alan Quartermaine (Stuart Damon) in bright red dress with a giant hat on ‘General Hospital‘ or Erica dressing in widow’s weeds when Adam forced her to remarry him on ‘All My Children‘, but Vivian earned her spot in the inappropriate wedding dress hall of fame.
Everybody Else’s Wardrobes. Since it was a surprise wedding, everyone was dressed in regular clothes. Bo was chilling in a short sleeved shirt. It gave the backyard festivities a barbecue vibe that fit the Memorial Day weekend airdates. Well, except for Carly (Crystal Chappell)who appeared to have turned a sofa slipcover from the 1970s into the top of her dress.
The One-Liners. How did all of the comic potential of the DOOL cast go untapped for so long? All of the years these talented actors spent hamming up the campy material of the James Reilly years squandered their talents and damaged their reputations. It turns out they can all hold their own in a quip off with the casts of gold standard funny casts of ‘All My Children‘ and OLTL.
The Wedding That Absolutely Everybody Hated Brought Enemies Together In Hilarious Unexpected Ways. Take this exchange between two of Victor’s ex-wives, Kate (Lauren Koslow) and Nicole (Arianne Zucker)
Nicole: So, I mean, do you know why he’s doing this?
Kate: I’m sure he has a reason.
Nicole: Hmm. Maybe he wants another baby.
That riff wouldn’t be out of place on ‘Modern Family.’ I loved the way all of the Salem Bad Girls united in hatred of the Salem Psycho.
Even characters who do not normally have much of a sense of humor rose to the occasion. Phillip (Jay Johnson) summed up the situation thusly, “Well… I have one hell of a blended family. My mother married the man who tried to kill me, and my father married the woman that tried to kill my wife.”
He later added this grade-A quip:
Victor: It means a lot to me that you all stayed. I know it wasn’t an easy decision.
Philip: Well, there’s cake, right?
Philip, you are a man after my own heart. I hope it was chocolate. You deserve it.
The decision to cut to Nicole, Carly and Kate all flashing back to their own ill-fated marriages to Victor during the ceremony was inspired. The photo at the reception of all the Mrs. Kiriakises past and present was even funnier. I hope that Victor really does, as promised, hang it his den and call it the Eumenides — and love that DOOL assumed its viewers were well read enough to get that reference.
Best of all, this wedding was not just an excuse for funny lines. At its core, it was true to DOOL’s core theme of family values. The people that cared about Victor and,as Maggie (Suzanne Rogers) put it, the people who care about people who care about Victor, banded together to show Vivian that she would not succeed at isolating Victor from his family. It was actually kind of sweet.
I was impressed that DOOL’s writers were inspired by the show’s budget woes to create such a great episode. Without the money for fancy dresses and a lavish reception, they could have easily opted for something as dull as a judge showing up in the living room without any guests. Instead, they found a way to give viewers what they really want: meaningful character interaction without spending anything on the glitz. The year is only half over, but so far, this was the most entertaining wedding of 2010.
Every Teenage Boy Deserves A Good Hooker
Congratulations ‘General Hospital‘ on finding a way to add to Michael’s martyrdom and be totally sexist at the same time. In what was meant to be a wacky comic subplot, Max (Derk Cheetwood) lamented to Diane (Carolyn Hennesy) that he had failed Michael by refusing to honor his request for a hooker. Now Michael is doomed to spend the next 2-5 years as a virgin. Yes, what a shame it is that a high school student did not have sex with a prostitute. Wait. What? I certainly believe that Angry Michael would have asked for a hooker, believing all the other boys his age had spent the year he was in a coma having sex. Teenage boys are idiots like that. Max, being a mobster, certainly is not going to have any ethical problems with procuring a prostitute. But why was Diane so amused by this story? As a woman who fancies herself a feminist, shouldn’t she have been appalled that Max did not see the issue with a boy who thinks of women as commodities that he can purchase for his pleasure? The worst part is that if GH does go ahead with the prison sexual assault storyline, it will be portrayed as worse because Michael was never with a girl. If only Michael had had a transactional, exploitative encounter with a sex worker who certainly would not have enjoyed the experience before he was assaulted, he would be so much better off! I am probably reading way too much into a couple of throwaway scenes, but why couldn’t have Max have been feeling bad for refusing Michael’s request that he teach him how to ask out cute girls from his school? That would have made everyone, including Michael, a lot more sympathetic.