‘Children’s Hospital’ Star Rob Huebel Hates Children…And Hospitals!

Rob Huebel (Michael Buckner/Getty Images)

Rob Huebel (Michael Buckner/Getty Images)

Rob Huebel’s been making our sides split with laughter since his days on MTV’s sketch comedy show ‘Human Giant.’ Since then, he’s hilariously spiced up a number of TV shows and films, like ‘The Other Guys’ and ‘I Love You, Man.’ In his latest series, Adult Swim’s ‘Childrens Hospital,’ Huebel and the insanely funny cast tackle spoofing the world of hospital dramas. Huebel chatted with Fancast about ghosts on the set, his intense hatred of children and why shooting a forthcoming live episode of ‘Childrens Hospital’ may be harder than you’d think.

How would you describe ‘Childrens Hospital’ to someone who’s never seen it?
It’s a really sort of twisted version of ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’ It’s set in a children’s hospital but it has nothing to do with kids or a hospital. It’s mostly a bunch of people that should not be around children or practicing medicine and just want to have sex.

What does your mom think of it?
My mom has this thing where if I’m doing anything doing dirty or crazy, she sniffs it out and yells at me. But the good thing is my mom doesn’t have cable and so much of the stuff I’ve done was on cable, so many times she’ll miss it. I tend to gloss over the crazier things I shoot. I just tell her this show is on the Cartoon Network so it’s for kids and it’s clean. [Laughs.]

There’s so much inappropriate material in the show. I can’t imagine what’s ending up on the cutting room floor.
I don’t know that we cut out a lot of stuff. It’s really cool because Adult Swim lets us do whatever we want, which is whatever makes us laugh. And sure, sometimes it’s crazy and inappropriate. The theory we have is no kids are awake at night. Their little bodies couldn’t stay up until 10:30 at night. They would explode.

How do you feel about hospitals?
I hate hospitals. Even if it’s a joyful occasion when a friend gave birth. It’s like ‘Oh look at the beautiful baby….and all the disease on the walls…’ We actually film in a real hospital; the same old abandoned one they shot ‘Scrubs’ at. There are ghosts there. Like the ghost of Zach Braff. And that janitor guy. It’s weird because here’s a building that’s been around for a while and seen a ton of death and sickness and we’re coming in to make some comedy.

Watch Huebel Answer Questions From Kids In ‘Children’s Hospital’:

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And how do you feel about children?
I really hate kids, too. They only think about themselves and their needs. They’re selfish. They’re arrogant. Especially child actors. Even though the show is called ‘Childrens Hospital,’ we don’t use kids a lot. They always want a juice box or a fruit roll up or a nap. Screw them.

Is it safe to assume you’re hoping for the same iconic status as Patrick Dempsey and getting a great nickname like Dr. McDreamy? What would your nickname be?
I just did a movie with McDreamy in Louisiana. I could only hope to have the lifestyle that that guy has. We’d go out to dinner and 40-year-old women are just going nuts. They come up to him like they’re meeting the Dalai Lama. They take off their underwear and hand it to him, and it’s not even subtle. So yes, I hope that because of this show I can achieve the same status. As for my nickname, I’d go with Dr. McSweaty. Chicks dig really sweaty guys. [Laughs.]

What can we expect to see during the next season of ‘Childrens Hospital’ [which starts August 22nd]?
There’s one huge thing. We’re shooing a totally live episode on October 10th.  Just like ‘ER’ shot a live episode. But it’s really hard to do. With ‘ER,’ those are professional actors that can memorize lines. We’re comedians and we drink a lot. So it makes remembering our marks and lines possible. It could be a total train wreck. We may have to show color bars. Aside from that, there are some great story lines. I sleep with Lake Bell, I sleep with Erinn Hayes, I sleep with Rob Corddry, I sleep with Nick Offerman, and I sleep with Paul Scheer. I wanted to sleep with Ed Begley Jr., but that didn’t work out.

Finally, you had a guest spot on the ‘Office’ as AJ, Holly Flax’s boyfriend. With Steve Carrell stepping down soon, who would get your vote to replace him?
Me. I would vote for me to come on and replace him. [Laughs] It’s seriously one of my favorite shows. I think Ricky Gervais would be pretty amazing. I would love that if he came and took over. Jason Bateman would be great in that role. And John Goodman is awesome. He’s so fun to watch, so I could see him doing that. But the best fit would be Nelson Mandela. It’d be cool to see him in there. I don’t know if he does sitcoms, but he could run Dunder Mifflin and make it globally important.

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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