‘Survivor: Nicaragua’ Power Rankings – Round 2

The Rules: Each week our two combatants will create separate power rankings. The ranking of the person who is voted out of the next episode will determine the number of points the two players will earn. For example, if Sash is voted out this week, Coach will receive 8 points and Gordon will receive 5 points. At the end of the season, the team with the most points will be named the “Survivor: Nicaragua” Power Rankings Challenge Champion.

Last Week: Shannon Elkins’s bizarre Tribal Council helped propel Team Dragon Slayer to a six point lead. Coach had Mr. Elkins in spot twelve while Gordon had him in spot six.

Now, let’s have a quick word with our two competitors…

Benjamin “Coach” Wade: I am going to continue to enlist the help of the King of Gabon (Randy Bailey). I have relegated him to only chiming in with one or two words but I think you will like what he has to contribute!
Gordon Holmes: I feel like there’s an alliance forming against me.

And before we start this week’s contest, let’s honor the most recent castaway with a new Power Rankings segment…coachrequiem

Coach’s Requiem: Shannon, I wish that you hadn’t been such a miter saw in Tribal Council. I liked your strong-to-the-end method but there is only one Slayer, my friend.

The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Boo, James, Russell, Who Dat. Tool Shed!


Current Score: 12


Current Score: 6

tyrone .. tyrone
#1: The man begins to speak and it is with humor, wisdom and courage.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Shaft!
#1: He’s strong, he’s smart, he’s keeping his head down in a crazy tribe – Tyrone is playing things just right. His next step is to find a solid alliance (Marty and Jill?) to help take the heat off of him once they hit mergeville.
brenda . marty
#2: Not only is she flirty and sexy, now she starts to make power moves! My dream woman…doesn’t she kayak or paddleboard too? Helping to turn the tribe around so that crescent wrench would be voted out was brilliant.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Lucy Liu!
#2: In Marty’s favor: He’s building alliances with the few sane people in Espada and he’s got the game’s first immunity idol. Working against Marty: He kind of reminds me of Keith Famie from “Survivor: The Australian Outback.” Anyone else getting that vibe?
marty . brenda
#3: A little power hungry and Gordon Gekko-like when he found the idol. “I found the idol (big eyes) I mean WE found the idol.” Give me a break. Be careful; Plato said that “The measure of a man is what he does with power.” Nevertheless, I think he is smart enough to stay under the radar and savvy enough to herd the sheep.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Randy wannabe.
#3: Every week Brenda makes me feel stupid for underestimating her. I’m going to keep going back to how she worked Chase. She didn’t say “Let’s get rid of Shannon.” She said, “Why do you need Shannon?” Totally put the ball in his court. Genius.
fabio . chase
#4: Ridiculous to a tee, this guy is pure entertainment. I love the hair flips, the “duh” looks and everything else that goes along with his 100 I.Q. However the true brilliance goes to his tribemates that nicknamed him Fabio… PERFECT!
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Good ta see ya, Matty.
#4: Chase, you’re not high on this list because I think you and Brenda are solid. (In fact, I’ve yet to see anything that shows me she’s into you at all.) You’re here because La Flor can’t afford to give up any of their strong guys now that Shannon is gone.
yve . sash
#5: Not sure about the edit so far. No confessionals yet which means she is either very boring or very safe. I pick the latter.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Yawn (But that’s how you win nowadays).
#5: The Biggest Bachelor in New York has to be liking his place in the game right now. He’s got a dominant alliance within a majority alliance…and it’s made of minorities. (OK, I confused myself.)  He has to be careful not to let the others in on what’s really going on or he could find himself headed back to the Big Apple.
kellyb . jill
#6: Really starting to love this girl. She kicked ass in the challenge, hasn’t used her leg as an excuse for anything and is starting to emerge as a player.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Time to put a beat down on NaOnka. I’m tired of her trash talkin’.
#6: Jill’s my vote for the most dangerous player in the game right now. If Espada heads into the merge with the numbers she’s golden. If they don’t, she’s the last person the youngsters would view as a threat.
benry . yve
#7: Even though you are not being shown, I can feel you safe and tucked away under my dragon wing. Watch out everyone, he’s flyin’ so low he’s buzzin’ the “Survivor” trees.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Douchag (not a typo).
#7: Still don’t know what to think of Yve. But seeing as she’s yet to submarine anyone’s shoes or have a fit over not being listened to, I’m going to assume she’s safe for the time being.
sash . benry
#8: Minority alliance…clever, Mr. Ladies Man. The question is, just how snakey are you going to get now that your snake is in foreign territory?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Two people arguing at Tribal Council; one is a confirmed idiot; therefore the other one must be an idiot. (I know, I should talk.)
#8: So…whose side was Benry on? He seemed to be down with Shannon’s Alpha Male alliance, but he voted with Team Brenda. Verdict is still out on him.
chase . kellys
#9: Now that your girlfriend is saved better watch out and separate (not that I’m jealous or anything).
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Thank you for getting rid of that Louisiana (expletive deleted).  Where were you for 19 and 20?
#9: Purple Kelly, Kelly Purple, whatever they call her has booked a flight on the Under-the-Radar Express.
Some people may hate that strategy, but far too many under-the-radar players have walked out of this game with a million-dollar check to dismiss it.
jane . kellyb
#10: Gotta come out with some more survival techniques to keep you off the chopping block. Not that you have to worry with Jimmy T and Kooky Bird Holly on your tribe.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Nice start.
#10: I think Kelly B. made a mistake at last week’s Tribal Council. She was very quick to speak up and say how much she trusted Shannon during his meltdown. Will this come back to bite her? I hope not, I think she’s adorable.
kellys . jane
#11: Growin’ on me. You are cute enough to be another Natalie White.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Reminds me of Jess from “Big Brother 8.”
#11: Jane will be fine…for now. There are way too many issues around Espada right now between the Holly vs. Dan feud and the JimmyX2 feud. But if Espada starts dropping challenges to the young bucks Jane’s days will be numbered.
jill . fabio
#12: Still not sure about you yet. You are on a tribe full of loons and buffoons so you are safe for now. I think you could go far unless there is a tribal switch and you end up on the wrong side.
King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Doctors never win. Good luck.
#12: Poor, Fabio. His main alliance member spontaneously combusted while NaOnka is hating on him for having the audacity to be upset with her for stealing his socks. He’ll be fine though, I’m sure La Flor is on his side when it comes to Sock-gate.
alina . jimmyt
#13: On the outs, gotta dodge and weave and bring in some bad-ass woman power. Get in with the girls cause the guys aren’t goin’ for you.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: WHO? (Read above comment for Yve.)
#13: “Jerry, Hello!” You’d think a super fan of “Survivor” wouldn’t make the mistakes Jimmy T. has been making. We didn’t see much of him last week, but they did hammer home that the Jimmy Feud is still very much alive. If it goes down, I still see T. prevailing over J., but only cause T.’s more useful in challenges.
dan . dan
#14: An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. I’m waitin’ for you to open up a can on that crazy hoot Holly for stealin’ those shoes. I like your style.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Guido.
#14: Prediction: The man with the $1,600 shoes becomes “Survivor’s” sole survivor and buys a million-dollar pair of pants with his winnings. Yeah, probably not.
jimmyt . naonka
#15: Such a character. I love it and I hope you stay but you gotta tone it down a little. Start wearin’ your hair in a samurai knot, it will help you think better.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: America’s vote my fat, flat, flabby ass.
#15: NaOnka is basically throwing her game away over a pair of socks. Seriously, just tell Fabio the socks are haunted and I’m sure he’ll hand them right over.
holly . jimmyj
#16: And I thought Crazy Sandy was crazy. Holly, you are giving coaches a bad name here. Pull up your bootstraps and act normal for cryin’ out loud.
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: OMG.
#16: Does Jimmy J. actually have any allies within Espada? It was nice to see him bring Holly back around last week, but have we actually seen him form any really strong bonds? That, and if Espada starts losing challenges he doesn’t bring much to the table as far as physical prowess.
naonka . alina
#17: Awesome entertainment, if you like that sleazy kind of evil manipulation and trash talkin’. Quite possibly the lowest line ever “I’m gonna punch that girl so hard her leg is going to fall off.” How low can you go, baby?
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: Starting to love her but won’t have much more time!
#17: “Oh, Johnny. Did you back the wrong horse.” Dr. Peter Venkman – “Ghostbusters II”

Yeah, I quoted “Ghostbusters II.” Wanna make something of it?

jimmyj . holly
#18: His snowballin’ isn’t stonewallin’ the Dragon Slayer. I’m not buyin’ his pep talks and although I could never coach like him in the NFL there is ONLY ONE COACH ON “SURVIVOR.”
The King of Gabon’s Two Cents: “No jury is ever gonna vote for me to win. I know that.” J.J., you’re not gonna get close to any jury.
#18: In honor of Coach agreeing to be my Power Rankings competition, I had the players come up with their own “Survivor” nicknames. Holly chose “Hollywood.” I think it’s accurate because she’s stopped eating and she’s lost her mind.

What Do You Think: Who’s going to win this round; Team Dragon Slayer or Team Truth Seeker? Would you pay $1,600 for shoes? Is there room for more than one Coach on “Survivor”?

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

, , , , ,

Comments are closed.