Who Should Play a Young Chelsea Handler in New ‘Vodka’ Pilot?

Lindsay Lohan, Arielle Kebbel, and Ke$ha (Jason Merritt/Jemal Countess/Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images)

Lindsay Lohan, Arielle Kebbel, and Ke$ha (Jason Merritt/Jemal Countess/Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images)

Is watching Chelsea Handler on E! every night not enough of the talk show hostess for you?  NBC has just greenlit a multi-camera sitcom pilot based on Handler’s best-selling memoir Are You There Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea. According to Deadline, the show “centers on a 20-something woman who has a very honest and provocative point of view on dating, friends and family.”

Since Deadline notes Handler won’t be starring in the series, who is the right actress to portray the younger version of the drinking, partying, nakedly ambitious comedian?  The role calls for someone with great comic timing, sex appeal and a trashy streak.  Here are five women who should definitely screen test for the part.

Arielle Kebbel
Kebbel was so funny, smart and likable as Stefan’s fun loving, phlebotomist-dating best friend Lexi in a single episode of ”The Vampire Diaries” that fans have been clamoring for her character to be resurrected from the dead ever since.  She proved she has a knack for playing women who like to party this season when she played Paige, a woman who burned down a bar when she threw a lit cigarette into a wastebasket after a drunken hook-up, on “Life Unexpected.”    That’s a whole episode of Chelsea’s new show right there.  Kebbel deserves a role that will put her front and center.

Britt Morgan
No recent fictional character has been so convincingly trashy as “True Blood’s” Debbie Pelt.  The v-addicted werewolf was hilarious, skanky and ruthless.  Those are all qualities that would make her portrayer Britt Morgan an excellent choice for the role of Chelsea.  Though Debbie Pelt is slated to appear in the next season of “True Blood,” the show’s production schedule allows its actors to do outside projects.  If there’s an episode about Chelsea getting publicly branded in a biker bar — which actually is a distinct possibility — Morgan is ready.

Sara Foster
She is a couple years two old for the role, according to IMDB, but that could actually make her more physically believable as Chelsea.  The actress, best known for playing the bitchy older sister from hell on “90210” will be more than capable of pulling off Handler’s barbed wit.  Foster began her career as the host of “Entertainment Tonight on MTV,” so she will be plausible as a future late night host.

She likes drinking so much that she brushes her teeth with a bottle of Jack.  She is a huge fan of casual sex.  The party doesn’t start until she walks in.  She is proud to dress badly. Her “songs” are really just a combination of talking, and autotune.  She looks much older than she actually is.  Her bravado cannot quite hide her desperation and insecurity. Let’s face it, Ke$ha is the musical equivalent of Chelsea Handler.   Can she act?  Who cares? She can’t sing, but she has not let that stop her from becoming one of the nation’s top musical acts.

Lindsay Lohan
It may seem like a crazy suggestion, but this could be the perfect comeback vehicle for the newly rehabbed Lohan.  She could draw on her real life drinking and partying experiences.  She once designed a pair of leggings with built-in kneepads, which is so very, very Chelsea.  Years of substance abuse have made the 24 year-old look a decade older.  Underneath all the craziness is a talented actress with great comic timing.  She was fantastic in “Mean Girls.”  The constant demands and predictable schedule of starring in a television series could be just what she needs to keep her on the straight and narrow.  If not, well, Charlie Sheen has even worse personal problems and he is the star of the country’s top sitcom.   She may need to bring a sober companion to the set, but Lindsay would be an amazing Chelsea.

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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