Man on a Mission: Day Two of Chatterbox Charlie’s Media Blitz

Charlie Sheen on 'Piers Morgan Tonight' (Photo: CNN)

Charlie Sheen on 'Piers Morgan Tonight' (Photo: CNN)

He’s Charlie Sheen, talking machine.

Like an Energizer bunny, the wayward star of “Two and a Half Men” didn’t stop to take a breath Monday and Tuesday as he continued beating a bass drum in support of his own, unique take on all the controversy swirling around him and his suspended sitcom.

“It’s been a tsunami of media. And I’ve been riding it on a mercury surfboard,” Sheen told Piers Morgan on “Piers Morgan Tonight” on CNN Monday. After hearing that statement, and others like it over the last 48 hours or so, it has finally dawned on us who Sheen reminds us of – Gary Busey! He’s another Hollywood guy with a history of addiction issues who’s given to uttering statements that seem to originate from another planet.

Sheen Jokes Are Winners for Late Night Hosts

The challenge for us – as for everyone out there trying to follow and understand Sheen’s self-styled media blitz this week – is to sort it all out. With that goal in mind, here’s a breakdown of what Charlie said in four of his most recent interviews:

On “Piers Morgan Tonight”: This interview, which encompassed the show’s entire hour, had Sheen revealing details he had not disclosed before about his life and work – for which we must credit Morgan. Among other things, Sheen said he has long clashed with his sitcom’s producers and CBS execs over his physical appearance. At various times, “they said I got too thin, and the year before this I was a little bloated. … They started putting me in a fish bowl. And every Friday night it turned into the big executive kind of in the corner hush-hush dialogue, whisper dialogue about my condition. It was a really hard situation to work in.”

Morgan also got Sheen to admit that he was warned to clean up his act or, at the very least, tone down his behavior. Sheen said CBS President Les Moonves came to his house at some point and the two had “a lovely chat” in Sheen’s kitchen. So, it seems as if Sheen shouldn’t really be too surprised that the network suspended his show last week.

“Two and a Half Men” Creator Chuck Lorre Responds to Charlie Sheen

Sheen admitted that he has smoked two packs of cigarettes a day for 25 years. He also conceded that he spends all his money as he earns it, which helps explain why he’s on this media blitz to restore his job and his reported $1.8 million-per-episode salary as soon as possible. He also said he was joking when he said in other interviews on Monday that he would require $3 million per episode to return to the show (not that anyone has asked him to return). “I have a 10,000-year-old brain and the boogers of a seven-year-old,” Sheen told Morgan, in another wild, Busey-like statement.

On “Access Hollywood“: Billy Bush asked Sheen if he thought he owed his co-stars, John Cryer and Angus T. Jones, a phone call to explain his actions over the last few days. And Sheen complained that it is they who owe him a public statement of support. “I feel like it would be nice if a statement came out from [Cryer] or Angus or [series director] James Widdoes – somebody saying, ‘Alright, we get it now.’ … It’d be so nice to have the support of somebody. … I’m not the only one that’s being screwed by this. They are too and they have the autonomy to take the same kind of action I’m taking,” Sheen said.

Sheen Discusses His “Goddesses” on “Today”

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On “The Today Show” on NBC: Correspondent Jeff Rossen met up with Sheen on Monday for a followup interview to the one Rossen conducted on Sunday. In the new interview, Sheen also talked about his co-stars and reiterated his plea that they get on his bandwagon and mount media blitzes of their own (though it’s doubtful they will). He also talked about his famous father, Martin Sheen, saying he’s “not interested” in his advice or counsel. “I’m 45 years-old,” Sheen said, “and I’m not interested in people treating me like a 12-year-old.” He also credited his media blitz with “pressuring” Warner Brothers into agreeing to pay the show’s cast and crew for four unproduced episodes of “Two and a Half Men.” A spokesman for Warner Brothers denies Sheen’s interviews had anything to do with that decision.

On ABC’s “Good Morning America“: The ABC morning show aired more brief excerpts of Andrea Canning’s lengthy interview with Sheen, conducted for Tuesday night’s special edition of “20/20” (10/9c). However, after all the other interviews Sheen has conducted in the last two days, it remains to be seen if this special “20/20” will contain anything new.

In fact, after two days of this, it’s worth asking: When will we grow tired of Charlie Sheen?

More on Charlie Sheen’s Rants

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The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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