‘General Hospital’ Delivers a Real Slap in the Face

Scene of the Day

I am not usually a fan of “General Hospital’s” Sam (Kelly Monaco). But I loved the scene on Tuesday’s episode when she let Carly have it for insisting that Jason end his date with Sam so he could help her search for baby Josslyn, who she rightly believed was going to be kidnapped by Jax (Ingo Rademacher). Carly’s actions did lead to Jason being seriously injured in a car accident. Her attitude that her friendship with Jason should trump Sam’s engagement to Jason is galling. It was satisfying to watch Sam call Carly out for using Jason’s guilt over Jake’s death to get him to help her, and for goading Sonny (Maurice Benard) into framing Jax for drug possession and assault, resulting in Jax losing custody of his child and resorting to desperate measures.

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I have wanted to slap Carly that hard on numerous occasions. The icing on the cake for me was Monica’s (Leslie Charleson) presence. When Carly claimed that she, “knew more about Jason being injured than [Sam] could ever understand, Monica responded,”That dubious honor falls to me. Want to compare losses?”  Checkmate, Monica.

Well, That Was Easy

There is only a month and a half more of “All My Children“, in its current ABC incarnation. That makes for a lot of storylines to simultaneously wrap up and turn into cliffhangers that will inspire viewers to tune in months from now when the show moves to the internet.  So I understand that the pace has to be fast, but boy is Dixie’s (Cady McClain) return to the land of the living moving at warp speed. Tad (Michael Knight) introduced her to their daughter Kathy, a six year old who has no memory of her. She instantly recognized Dixie from her photos. Within about thirty seconds she was asking her if she could call her Mommy. Boy, that was easy!

In the same episode, Tad’s wife, Cara (Lindsay Hartley) also learned that Dixie was alive. Cara found out in the least dramatic way possible. Opal (Jill Larson), who had also seen Dixie, blurted it out to her at the hospital. So much for the shock of Cara walking in on Tad and Dixie kissing. Granted. Tad and Cara’s relationship began as a marriage of convenience, but Dixie made her presence known just as Tad and Cara were preparing to go on a romantic vacation. It seemed like a missed opportunity. We all know Tad and Dixie are the endgame, but they should have a little bit of conflict.

Meanwhile, everyone continued to act like David (Vincent Irizarry) was the worst person in the world for saving people’s lives and inventing a way to cure Angie’s (Debbi Morgan) blindness. Yes, it’s creepy that he is experimenting on people without their consent. It’s horrible that he allowed their loved ones to But, he figured out how to revive people who have been declared dead. They cannot give consent because they are unconscious. In the real world. people would be traveling thousands of miles to be treated by him. It’s a conceit of the show. It’s okay for Ryan to install a tracking device in David’s cell phone. It’s understandable that Jesse passed off an abandoned baby to Angie as her own still born child (hey, maybe David could have saved the baby), but David is the evilest man alive. How can the people of Pine Valley dislike a man who points out to Krystle (Bobbie Eakes), “You are living with your loser ex-husband and his kind of hot wife.”

Come On, Irene

I realize that there is never going to be a satisfying, logical explanation for the two Todds storyline on “One Life to Live.” It’s great drama, but it’s inherently preposterous. Now both men’s DNA is a match for Todd, which, as every character hilariously pointed out means nothing because the labs always get the DNA test wrong in Llanview. John (Michael Easton), claimed that he had made sure different procedures were used this time. Does that mean John sent the two Todds DNA to Maury Povich? Either the test was wrong, Trevor St. John Todd is Roger Howarth Todd’s long lost identical twin who had plastic surgery so he would like Walker Lawrence, or RHTodd’s unwittingly became TSJ Todd’s bone marrow donor.  I am willing to go along with any of these explanations, even though none of them explain why both Todds seem to have the same memories.

However, the big reveal at the end of Tuesday’s episode, that Todd’s mother Irene Manning (Barbara Rhodes) is the mastermind who has been holding RH Todd hostage and ordering him to be tortured for the past eight years left me scratching my head. Why would she want her son to be tortured and replaced with an impostor? Or favor one son over the other if they are, in fact, twins? Why was she also holding Patrick Thornhart? Why resurrect a character who has been dead for 30 years instead of making the culprit someone with more current ties to the canvas? Or just do a “Sommersby“/Don Draper storyline about a guy who decided to take on someone else’s identity so he could become rich and powerful then ended up falling in love with his wife and family? A week from now this twist may make sense, but right now it’s less, “Hell yeah!” and more, “Huh?”

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