Watch the Grossest Clue-Chain in ‘NCIS’ History



When a United States Coast Guard petty officer is gunned down aboard a civilian ship, Gibbs (Mark Harmon) and CGIS Special Agent Abigail Borin (Diane Neal) join forces to hunt down the killer. But they are surprised to find that the only living people onboard are four Lebanese family members seeking asylum in the U.S.

Leave it to Abby (Pauley Perrette) to figure out — through very gross means — that the four Bawali family members are the only ones who have been on the ship in the previous week by inspecting their poop. Because, as she points out, even if the crew took everything with them when they jumped ship, they would still have left behind their human waste products.

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“I dutifully examined every sample,” Abby, whose lab is now understandably covered in pine air fresheners, tells Gibbs. “There were only four unique poop profiles. So, not only is the family lying to us, one of them is the shooter.”

When Ziva (Cote de Pablo) returns to the ship and confronts Mariam Bawali (Shohreh Aghdashloo, “24,” in a stellar guest-star performance), she claims she was the one that shot the petty officer in an attempt to protect her husband and sons.

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But when a facial recognition program unearths the information that Farid Bawali (David Diaan) is a wanted terrorist for a bomb explosion that took several lives 27 years ago in a coffee shop frequented by American servicemen in Lebanon, all bets are off. Gibbs brings him in for questioning.

Still, the father lies and says one of his sons committed the murder. Gibbs is perplexed at first, but then Abby figures out that the reason the petty officer was shot was to get the vessel towed into port, where it can serve as a detonator. The blast from a bomb aboard it and its ramifications would take out half the Norfolk naval base.

The motive? Years earlier the Bawali’s daughter/sister was killed by American forces. Mariam convinces her son not to detonate the bomb, and she and the other son are allowed into the U.S.

While all this was happening, Ziva, Tony (Michael Weatherly) and McGee (Sean Murray) decide to find the perfect woman for Gibbs. Agent Borin is on the search and she loans the team her extensive phone book of friends to help them in their hunt for the perfect woman. When they finally settle on a candidate and present her to Gibbs, he turns the tables on them. It seems that he already has dated her and will only say, “Nothing is more boring than perfect.”

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