At least the “Glee” writers didn’t bother with a painstakingly slow buildup to the inevitable Shelby/Puck (hereby known as “Shuck,” which rhymes with “yuck”) romance storyline.
It also helps that Mark Salling (the Puckster himself) broke through the could-pass-as-a-teeny-bopper barrier some time ago. Gleeks, you are surely too young to remember this, but in the olden days known as the late 90s, there was a show called “Dawson’s Creek” on which this boy Pacey, who looked about 12, lost his virginity to his English teacher, who did not look 12 or even 24. Shuck is decidedly less scarring to your eyeballs.
My point is if the gods atop Mount Glee are intent on making us squirm in between our show tunes, I’m glad they got to it quick and are doing it with people who are not icky to watch together.
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It’s a safe bet that Quinn will be sick with fury when she discovers where Puck’s loyalties lie. She’s probably not going to find a 30-year-old Foreigner slow jam as soothing as Shelby did.
I predict that the Wrath of Quinn will come in the form of her discovering and subsequently exposing the Shuck affair. Because as brilliant as planting a book on satanic baby sacrifice was, it probably wasn’t going to get Q her baby back.
Other than the plot to get her kid taken away plus that dating-a-student business, things are going well for Shelby. Her new glee club has a name – The Troubletones – and its membership has doubled from last week. Mercedes lured Santana away from New Directions with promises of a shiny, Rachel-free spotlight, then Santana manipulated her secret gf Brit into defecting as well.
Finn, who is suddenly like the grand poobah of glee memberships, took the girls’ departure especially poorly; he actually called Brittany an idiot. Sure she thought the new Irish exchange student living in her house was a leprechaun who would grant her wishes, but an idiot? Harsh, man.
By the end of the episode, Finn had made peace with losing members as long as he could gain new ones. Remember that Irish exchange student? His name is Rory. Finn saved him from a gaggle of bad-haired baddies and then, psychically sensing that Rory could carry a tune, invited him to audition for New Directions.
Damian McGinty, who plays Rory, was one of the co-champs of “The Glee Project” over the summer. A word to those who may have skipped this cable competition series: The contenders were hardly presented with acting challenges. Not that acting in a music video is a cake walk. But in a competition where the prize is a recurring role on a show that’s just as popular for its one-liners and characters as for its catchy production numbers, the occasional reciting of dialogue could have come in handy when picking a winner.
So it felt like the other actors were carrying Damian through his scenes a little bit. Hopefully his performances will become more relaxed and organic as his episodes tick by.
The guest star I’m interested in seeing more of is Mike O’Malley as Porcelain’s dad, Burt Hummel. I’ll likely get my wish, now that Burt has decided to run for Congress against Sue. But how are we supposed to choose between their platforms of the arts versus special education in public schools? If only Sue could cut that monthly pompom budget of hers….
Here are a few other highlights:
Best musical number: “Candyman.” It wouldn’t win in a contest between bests of all time, but it’s a super catchy song, and the ladies ate up the choreography. Plus it was nice hearing Mercedes do something a bit different than her usual thing.
Best Sue-ism: “I am literally horny with fear.”
Runner-up – “Can’t put a price on cheer, William.”
Best Brittany line: Her thought when Santana brings up the thing they never talk about: “What, that Sour Patch Kids are just gummy bears that turned to drugs?”
And some lowlights:
Worst musical number: “Bein’ Green.” Rory is no Kermit. Also, he got two solo ballads, which was excessive. The other one was better.
Worst hair: Those jocks who were bullying Rory were all kinds of fluffy, but that’s more acceptable than Puck’s combed-over mohawk.
Most vomit-inducing incident: Brit picked up that candy bar, handed part to Rory, and they just ATE IT, even though it had been resting on a bed of kitty litter. Yum.