Since it took Kim Kardashian a mere 72 days to back out of her marriage with Kris Humphries, we kinda wanted her to back out of the spotlight for at least 72 days — because we’re dying for a break from all this Kardashian Krap-to-strophic drama.
But considering Kimmie’s first love is her career, that’s just silly wishful thinking…
Check out the latest ups and downs in the Kardashian post-divorce announcement soap opera:
Loyalty deserves a self-indulgent kiss from a perfectly bronzed goddess. Thanking her “loyal blog dolls” for being so supportive amid her “divorce crisis” (a.k.a. brain-freeze crisis), Kim offers her “fans” a “generous” gift: a picture of her blowing a kiss. (Uhh, yeah. We think they’d prefer some of that $18 million wedding loot, or—like one commenter notes—some re-gifting from her expensive-arse wedding gifts.)
Kim’s Lawyer Swears Marriage the Real Deal. Celebrified attorney Laura Wasser, who’s usually hush-hush about the legal issues of her A-list clientele, went on the record saying she has no reason to believe that Kim and Kris’ marriage was fake. (Wait. She’s a lawyer…we’re supposed to believe her?)
“Our office did indeed negotiate and prepare a prenup for Ms. Kardashian,” Wasser says. Given what I know regarding that document, it is not plausible that this marriage was a sham.”
She adds that the purported 30-page prenup involved financial issues “that go well into the future,” which, to her, was an indicator that the marriage wasn’t a get-rich-quick scheme.
Watch: Kim Kardashian at War Over Hairy Lawsuit:
Kim’s Hairy Situation. Never mind the divorce, Kim’s in the crosshairs of another legal matter: She’s being sued by a hair-removal company called Radiancy. In the lawsuit, the company claims Kim has been misleading the public by making false—and dangerous—statements about the efficacy of a rival hair-removal product by a company called TRIA.
Radiancy points out that Kim went on “The Wendy Williams Show” claiming she uses TRIA’s product “on her entire body,” even though TRIA admits the product isn’t safe to use on the face, neck, ears, and private parts.
In addition, Radiancy states that after becoming its new spokesperson, Kim had only been using the TRIA product for a few weeks before she hastily tweeted she was “loving the results so far.” (The product claims results begin after 90 days.)
Radiancy is requesting that Kim and TRIA stop their false advertising and is seeking moolah for losing business over the matter.
A Signature Ending. To Kim’s relief, Kris plans on signing divorce papers—with no drama attached.
However, according to onlookers, who recently saw him with friends at NYC’s Serafina’s (one of his fave hangouts with his soon-to-be ex-wife), he was looking like a forlorn, heartbroken giant.
“Kris looked so depressed,” said one source. “He looked like he was going to cry in his pizza, sat at the same table he used to sit with Kim.”
Awww. But perhaps there were just too many onions on his pie…