‘Parenthood’: Adam Demonstrates How To Ruin A Marriage

Peter Krause in Parenthood (NBC)

Peter Krause in Parenthood (NBC)

Hey, guys, would you like to wreck your happy marriage in six easy steps? Adam Braverman (Peter Krause) is here to show you how in this week’s episode of “Parenthood“, “Mr. Honesty.”

Step one:  let your sexy new secretary kiss you.

Step two: do not tell your wife.

If you still are not clear how to accomplish this, check out last week’s episode:

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This week, Adam starts with:

Step three: talk to Crosby

Crosby (Dax Shepard) advises Adam not to tell Kristina (Monica Potter). Why is Adam taking advice about women, or anything really, from Crosby? “Do The Opposite of What Crosby Does” seems like a good rule. Though, Crosby is right that Kristina is not going to take this well, The proper time to tell her was immediately after it happened: “Honey, this drunk chick attacked me. It was horrible! Now I need to figure out how to avoid a sexual harassment lawsuit when I fire her.” Instead, Adam puts on his Bad Idea Jeans.

Step four: when your wife is making small talk, blurt out that your secretary kissed you.

Kristina is, to put it mildly, not happy that Adam and Rachel (Alexandra Daddario) locked lips. She assumes Rachel’s out the door. Adam tells Crosby they have to fire Rachel. Crosby claims that Adam shares some responsibility for the slide into first base, saying Adam’s whole “Roxanne, you don’t have to sell your body to the night” schtick from last week would make any insecure young woman think he was interested.  Rachel plays Fur Elise on the piano  as Adam enters the room. It’s like “Parenthood’s” take on the opening scene of a  Cinemax movie. How can he can someone while she is being so artistic? So it’s onto…

Step five: Plan to fire your secretary, then chicken out and just tell her that you will let her go if she comes onto you again.

Step six: Let your wife think that you fired the office temptress.

Adam’s plan to pretend he fired Rachel instantly hits a snag when she answers the phone when Kristina calls Adam at work. Was Adam just assuming that Kristina would never call or visit the Luncheonette?

Kristina confronts him, in an ugly, realistic scene, with both characters talking over each other. Kristina demands to know both what happened between he and Rachel and why Adam lied to her. Adam makes things even worse for himself by admitting he finds Rachel attractive and accusing Kristina of overreacting. Adam digs an even deeper hole when he says he did not want to hurt Rachel’s feelings. Kristina tells Adam she doesn’t have his back anymore.

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She decides to go back to work because she wants to do what is best for her instead of what is best for the family. Go, Kristina!  Betrayal brings out the best in you. Also, there is finally a dual career household on the show. Welcome to the, uh, 1980s, “Parenthood.”

In other Braverman news, Zoe’s (Rosa Salazar) boyfriend Troy is a no show for breakfast with Joel (Sam Jaeger) and Julia (Erika Christensen). Joel visits him at the convenience store where he works. Troy is played by Rafi Gavron, AKA Lux’s superhot boyfriend Bug from “Life Unexpected.” No wonder Zoe puts up with him skipping dates. Troy agrees to come to dinner, requesting steak. That’s obnoxious, but the dude does not know how to behave because he grew up in foster care and Lux turned down his marriage proposal and now he’s ended up on a different show preparing to give up his own child. It’s the circle of TV life.

At dinner, Troy suggests that Joel and Julia compensate them for their baby. Though Julia has been joking about buying Zoe’s baby all season, she gets all high and mighty about it being illegal to sell a child. Troy becomes even more of a one dimensional borderline abusive boyfriend when he orders Zoe to leave. Zoe makes like the victim in a Lifetime movie and tells Julia that Troy is “just looking out for her.” Julia reiterates that she can’t give her money.

Despite working her butt off at the coffeehouse, Amber (Mae Whitman)is $140 short on her rent. Her landlord gives her 24 hours to come up with it. Finally, Amber is having realistic money problems. No way she could afford her own apartment in the Bay Area on a barista’s salary. To compound her troubles, her car breaks down. Camille loans her money, but makes it clear this is a one time thing. Sarah (Lauren Graham) tries to get Amber to make a budget. She freaks out about not having any goals. Sarah assures her they will figure something out.

Jabbar (Tyree Brown) asks Crosby and Jasmine (Joy Bryant)when they are getting married. They explain their break-up to him. Jabbar admits he wishes they all lived together. Crosby confides to Zeek (Craig T. Nelson) that he realizes that when he cheated on Jasmine he did not just destroy his relationship, but Jabbar’s chance at having a nuclear family. How self-absorbed is he that he never considered this before? Zeek assures him that he is a great Dad. Well, coming from a man whose kids all sort of hate him that is high praise indeed. When Crosby drops off Jabbar’s teddy bear, Jasmine offers him a glass of wine and they end up having sex. Uh, Jasmine? You are dating a hot pediatrician. Why would you wreck that for a guy who cuts his hair with a weed whacker? It turns out there is someone on earth with worse judgment than Adam.

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