Sad night on “American Idol”! In another devastating blow to the Y chromosome, we said goodbye to Burnell Taylor. It’s the first time this season that we lost someone who probably still had a couple good weeks left in him. And now it leaves only Lazaro “inexplicably in third place” Arbos representing the dudes in the competition. Sorry, dudes.
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But it had to happen. Burnell’s been pretty wonderful thus far in the competition, unafraid of developing a signature weirdness, and has an inspirational weight-loss story to boot, but he lacks the power of the girl singers. And Wednesday night was, let’s face it, his worst ever. As Jimmy Iovine put it in his recap, Burnell “gave rock a bad name” with Bon Jovi attempt.
What else did Jimmy have to say? That hard, bitter truth, of course. Angie Miller and Lazaro performed their duet as if they were wedding singers at a wedding Jimmy would cancel. In his solo, Lazaro did a “reasonable job” but not good enough to stay on this show. The trio of Amber Holcomb, Janelle Arthur and Kree Harrison looked like “an outtake of ‘Grease.’” Candice’s song choice didn’t have the melody she needed. Angie’s wind machine was on tornado setting, and she’s too much in her head. The only really good news was for Kree, who “sings with dignity” despite a pinched nerve, and Amber, who is improving every week. Jimmy’s prediction for last place was Lazaro.
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And Jimmy’s prediction for the Top 3: Amber, Angie and Kree.
We also got Top 3 picks from all the judges, which apparently came about in the form of trickery and/or abuse by executive producer Nigel Lythgoe. “I didn’t know this was going to be told to the world,” Nicki Minaj said. “They basically bound and gagged me in my trailer,” Mariah Carey said.
Anyway, everyone but Mariah had the same picks as Jimmy. Mariah, though, went with Candice over Angie, and even though I think Mariah’s insane most of the time, I have to agree with her assessment.
Anyway, after performances by Carrie Underwood, and—shocker—Season 9’s Casey James (he still looks like a blonde puppy), we found out the true Top 3. They were: Kree, Angie and…dun dun dun… Lazaro. Who looked completely unfazed and rather entitled about the fact that he is continuing to basically steal this show from the more deserving.
Candice and Amber were also safe, leaving Janelle and Burnell in the bottom 2. And you know what happened after that.
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Burnell sang “Ready for Love” as his save song, and it was lovely and Burnelly. All four judges gave Burnell a standing o, and Mariah teared up, but still, they did not use the save.
Somehow amid the high drama, Burnell managed to sing right into the faces of the other Idols, who at this point were crying ridiculously. Except Lazaro, who was mouthing the words. Oh, so now you know the words to a song, when it’s the elimination song of your competitor? Oooh, that Lazaro!
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