‘Survivor’ Blue Collar Rodney – “If You Come After Me, Bring a Hammer”

"Survivor: Worlds Apart" (CBS)

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Name: Rodney Lavoie Jr.
Age: 24
Current Residence: Boston, Massachusetts
Occupation: General Contractor

Gordon Holmes: Your inspiration in life is a gentleman by the name of Tom Brady, quarterback for the New England Patriots. And, you refer to his wife Gisele Bundchen as a “slampiece.”
Rodney Lavoie Jr.: (Laughs)
Holmes: Could you do me a favor and define the word, “slampiece”?
Lavoie: No, she’s a dimepiece!
Holmes: Alright, the bio I was handed says, “slampiece.” What is a dimepiece?
Lavoie: You can be good looking, but you’ve got no personality. You’ve got no gift for gab. But she’s a businesswoman, she’s a superstar, she’s a model. And you can tell she’s not one of those trashy pigs who’s sleeping with everyone. She’s with Tom Brady. She’s with the G.O.A.T. Those two are like lamb and tuna fish. They’re grilled cheese and a (expletive deleted) cup of (expletive deleted) joe.
Holmes: So, dimepiece is the highest possible compliment. Where did “slampiece” come from?
Lavoie: That bio must be wrong. Brady, I ain’t calling your girl a slampiece.
Holmes: Watch Brady’s a huge “Survivor” fan and is going to come after you.
Lavoie: (Laughs) Yeah, he’s like, “This (expletive deleted) kid!”

Holmes: So, you’re not a big “Survivor” fan. How’d you get dragged into this mess?
Lavoie: I was at “The Hero” casting for the Rock and they’re like, “Listen, ‘Survivor’ is for you.” And it’s actually better because people who have seen all the seasons, they think this strategy will work or this strategy will work. I’m coming in with a fresh mindset. I’m coming in with my strategy and how I do (expletive deleted). Not how three seasons of people play the game.
Holmes: So, you think it’s better to trust your instincts than to know what’s worked in the past?
Lavoie: I think this game is all instincts. It’s a mixture of instincts and luck. It’s like a football game, if it bounces your way you’re going to win the game. You’re going to get hit, and you’ve got to get back up.

NOTE: Rodney had writing on his hand.

Holmes: What’s going on with your hand there?
Lavoie:  I’ve just got some notes for the interview. (Laughs)
Holmes: You’re not trusting your instincts?
Lavoie: (Laughs) I’m always prepared.

Holmes: You’ve seen your competition. Are you comfortable deceiving them?
Lavoie: I’m a (expletive deleted) salesman. My product…there’s 150 other people who sell it, and maybe they can sell it cheaper. Why do they go to me? Cause they trust me. They know I’m going to bang the job out the right way.
Holmes: Do you consider yourself a good liar?
Lavoie: I’m a great liar.

Holmes: Tell me about these tats.
Lavoie: This is “The King.” Cause what does a king do? He runs (expletive deleted). He ain’t a follower. I never followed nobody my entire life. I got this when I was sixteen. I’ve been hustling, I’ve been grinding since I was sixteen. Anybody who sees me, they look up to me and they respect me. That’s how I grew up. When I was younger, say I banged my knee on a rock? My father would see me crying  and he’d be like, “Are you bleeding? No? Then get the (expletive deleted) back up. You (expletive deleted).” That’s how I was taught. There are no tears. One of the guys said that 80% of the people cry on this show. You’re not going to see a single tear out of me.

Holmes: On your left you have tattoos of your father and your mother. Are they still around?
Lavoie: Yeah. My grandfather was a World War II hero. He was over in Italy and he saved over 51 men who were trapped. There’s a street named after him back in my hometown. He’s one of the realest dudes you’ll ever meet. My mother was 19, and my grandfather died. A year later, my grandmother died. So I never got to meet them. My mother lost both her parents and she had my brother. She was by herself. She’s one of the realest people I’ve ever met in my entire life. She’s a soldier. So, I got this tattoo because you only have two parents and you never know when they’re going to go. I was a young kid and that’s how wise I was. I’m not going to put something (expletive deleted) on my arm. I’m going to put my family on my arm.

Holmes: And what’s the tattoo on the inside there.
Lavoie: That’s my sister. I found her dead two years ago.
Holmes: That’s Natalie?
Lavoie: Yeah.
Holmes: If you don’t mind going into this; what happened?
Lavoie: The tattoo says, “Dear Natalie, even though I’ll never see you again, you’ll always be my big sister. Love Bubba.” That’s a nickname she used to call me. She was a lesbian. I was at one of the first gay weddings ever. They were playing (Sings) “I kissed a girl and I liked it!” And I had a great time. I had my shirt off, I was grinding with her fiancee’s mother. It was a great time. Shortly after that she moved to New Mexico. And she didn’t tell us, but she was living on the streets of New Mexico because they broke up. She didn’t tell us that. She was living in her car, she was doing drugs. So, she finally called my father and came back home. And one day we go to knock on her door. No answer. So, me and my father break through the window and we see my sister face down on the ground. She must’ve choked on her vomit, smoked some crack. It’s tough, man. People ask if I can survive out here. I say, “You got a sister? You got a mother or a father? You ever pick them up to see their dead body?” Until I got this tattoo I didn’t shed one tear because I had to stay strong for everybody. I’m a strong (expletive deleted). If you come after me, bring a hammer and knock me the (expletive deleted) out. You talk (expletive deleted) about my family? I’m coming after you.
Holmes: I can’t even imagine that.
Lavoie: It all stems from who you’re raised by. I was raised by an awesome mother. Her mother wasn’t there for her.
Holmes: How does your mom feel about you being out here?
Lavoie: (Laughs) My mother, when they took my phone, she was like, “Don’t hang up! Leave a voicemail!” She thought I was going to Iraq to fight the war. She didn’t want me to go. She’s happy for me, but she’s going to miss her baby boy.

Holmes: Her baby boy is going to be around some attractive women in the near future. Are you open to flirting to get ahead?
Lavoie: When you look on the Internet, people who watch pornos…
Holmes: There’s porn on the Internet?
Lavoie: (Laughs) That’s good. The number one thing you see is someone (expletive deleted) their college professor. I banged my professor.
Holmes: C’mon, Rodney. “Made love” to your professor. Let’s keep it classy.
Lavoie: (Laughs) She was awesome. She was a good girl. She took care of me. She calls me “The Italian Stallion.” I also banged my babysitter. Older women love me for some reason.
Holmes: Whoa…back up. Your babysitter? How old were you?
Lavoie: I was like 17 or 18.
Holmes: OK…so it wasn’t like you were literally in need of a babysitter at the time.
Lavoie: (Laughs) Yeah! It wasn’t like I was twelve.

Holmes: You ever go camping?
Lavoie: Not really. My idea of camping is you go see the Red Sox, you see the Patriots. You go to New Hampshire and you’ve got jet skis and a lake house. It’s going to be funny to watch me adapt to that kind of (expletive deleted) because that’s not my lifestyle.

Holmes: If there is a twist this season, what do you think it’ll be?
Lavoie: You’ve got special idols. Maybe they’ll send a past player back on the show. There could be something with the merge. It’s like Jeff says, they keep the format, but they want to keep you on your heels. I’ve just got to adapt once it happens.

Holmes: If you could align with any past player, who would it be?
Lavoie: It would be Russell or Boston Rob. If I’m looking for an idol, I’ll be like, “Oh, I was looking for my earring piece.”  Rob would do stuff like that. But other than that we’re not alike. I’m good at hiding what I’m really doing. I’m aware of everything that everyone is doing.

Holmes: Leaders don’t fare very well on this show. They tend to be the first target. You’ve got a big personality. Are you worried about falling into the leader role or would that be something you’d pursue?
Lavoie: I sell Jordan sneakers back home. I have kids who don’t even make a profit line up outside of the mall. I have 20 of them buying sneakers for me. I hand them the money and they buy them for me. They resell for a lot of money. Now there are no more sneakers left in the mall. Now they’re in my (expletive deleted) trunk. I’m the store. Instead of them being $150, I make a thousand or two off of each pair.
Holmes: Wait, how are these kids not making a profit?
Lavoie: They respect me. They love me. I give one kid $100 and he gets all of his crew and I hook them up with beers…lounge chairs…a turkey sandwich. I take care of them.
Holmes: These kids need an agent. If you’re making thousands, I’m gonna want more than a turkey sandwich.
Lavoie: (Laughs) I’ve got a good personality! I can convince someone to do something so dumb, but I make it sound so good. I’m gonna give the camera the real Rodney, but when I play the game I’m gonna fall back. I’m gonna let everyone else dig their holes. You see people telling people what to do. Who’s the whack job?
Holmes: You’re going to have to be way more specific.
Lavoie: Phillip. He’s all up on people. You’re in the heat and you’re frustrated. You’ve got to lift people up. I remember it was three days out and the girl at Tribal says she wants cookies. Malcolm answered it perfectly. He said, “You know what? It may not have been my answer, but that’d be nice.”

Holmes: What do you think of your future tribemates?
Lavoie: I’m very comical. I love busting people’s balls. You’ve got Mike Tyson, the girl with the face tattoo. You’ve got Colonel Sanders with the beard. Harry Potter’s grandfather. You’ve got Pocahontas with the (expletive deleted) feathers in his hair. With his food he does this trance thing every time he eats. Some weird cult stuff, I don’t know what he’s doing. You’ve got the two older women who I love. Mark it down, I think me and them are going to pair up. I’ve got a solid two in my back pocket. Older women have experience. They’ve got to last longer. The young women after five days? The estrogen is going to boil up. And they’re not ready for this game. I can tell these girls are real soft.
Holmes: So no potential professors or babysitters?
Lavoie: I think they picked the perfect cast for me not to fall in love with any of these broads. They’re so mediocre, it’s not even funny. There’s no (expletive deleted), there’s no (expletive deleted). So I’ll be flirting, but I’m not into these broads at all.

Don’t miss the 90-minute premiere of “Survivor: Worlds Apart” on Wednesday, February 25, 2015 at 8 pm ET on CBS.

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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