‘Survivor’ Castaway Abi-Maria: ‘Being Real on ‘Survivor’ Is Not a Great Strategy’

"Survivor: Second Chance" (CBS)

Quick Note: We’re going to be bringing you all kinds of “Survivor” fun this season including episode recaps, exit interviews, and Power Rankings with Jenn Brown and Max Dawson. Be sure to follow me on Twitter (@gordonholmes) for up-to-the-minute news and info.

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What do Andrew Savage, Ciera Eastin, and Jeff Varner have in common?

They all used the word “loyal” to describe Abi-Maria Gomes in their exit interview.

That’s right, the same Abi-Maria who seemed to bounce from alliance to alliance, calling out her partners in public fashion, and saying she didn’t know who she was going to vote with at Tribal is super loyal.

I spoke with the “Brazilian Dragon” the morning after her elimination and asked her about her wild game, last night’s odd vote, and Joe’s golden locks.,,

Abi-Maria Gomes: Good morning, Gordon!
Gordon Holmes: Good morning, Abi. I hear you’re well caffeinated.
Gomes: I’m trying. I’m getting there. I literally just got out of bed.
Holmes: Then let’s do this. You voted for Keith while everyone else voted for you or Tasha. What happened there?
Gomes: I thought I was sitting right in the middle. I thought I was exactly in the spot that Spencer is in right now. Just being able to go with Jeremy and Tasha or Wentworth and Keith. I thought I was sitting pretty. The only reason I voted for Keith, was last week Kimmi mentioned that she wanted to do a woman-strong alliance. And I was on board. It was my whole reason to vote for Keith was to empower the women and send a message that a woman can be strong. That’d give us the numbers.
Holmes: When Tasha asked to speak to Jeremy alone…that would raise some red flags with me.
Gomes: Right! Yeah. It’s like, “Hello, people, we’re the final seven!” I don’t want to curse…
Holmes: Feel free to curse.
Gomes: I was like, “What the (expletive deleted). Really, Tasha?! Really?!” That’s how I felt. So much happened and honestly at that point we shot from May to June and everything seems like a dream at this point. Everything is so blurry in my memory. In “Survivor” world people love to see me as a dingle berry. That little piece of (expletive deleted) that’s just hanging.
Holmes: (Laughs) You never know where these interviews are going to go.
Gomes: (Laughs)

Holmes: But that brings up an interesting point. When I asked about you in exit interviews, your edit had you coming off as wildly erratic, but the word that came up often from your peers was “loyal.”
Gomes: I was extremely loyal. Gordon, I was so loyal. If you weren’t waking up the Brazilian dragon, I was with you all the way.
Holmes: Then why do people feel the need to wake the dragon…
Gomes:  I don’t…
Holmes: And then give her coffee?
Gomes: (Laughs) I believe they had just watched my last season. I do think that people were doing their homework. They had probably just watched “Survivor: Philippines.” And I don’t know if they were aware of the wording that was used towards me. Especially by Peih-Gee…and Wiglesworth. They were using such accurate words that were used against me in the Philippines. Call it paranoia, but I’m pretty sure that’s what it was. There were so many similarities. I had Denise dreams, flashbacks, 2.0. It’s like, “Denise is here! She came back to haunt me! I see her in the body of a dementor! What the heck?!”

Holmes: If the Keith vote had gone your way last night, what was your plan for the rest of the game?
Gomes: I was hoping to go to the end with Kimmi and Tasha.
Holmes: Did you think the jurors wouldn’t appreciate the game they were playing?
Gomes: I was playing my game moment by moment. I knew that I had a lot to patch up with the jury. I was hoping to be nourished after having the meal prior to the jury. You get that breakfast. I was hoping to have a glass of champagne and a nice breakfast and get to the final Tribal and tell my story. I was a target since day one and I managed to get through the swaps and the merge. And after all that target on my back, I felt like the move I made at Angkor was powerful by saying good-bye to Ta Keo. I was on the bottom and approached Tasha and Savage and started a new alliance. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the advantage of building bonds with the Bayon people because I was stuck in the ghetto. I didn’t get to meet a bunch of those people. At the merge I was trying to understand the relationship they had. I was trying my best. But, apparently people seem to not like me on “Survivor.”
Holmes: That’s one of the amazing things about you. On the show you’re the dragon and in real life you’re delightful and very personable.
Gomes: It’s just so easy to throw me under the bus. I think that when it comes to the social experiment that people identify with whatever is easier to identify with. And I’m not the best example of someone people would identify with. We come from such different walks of life. But, I’m real. And being real on “Survivor” is not a great strategy.

Holmes: So…the Poopy Pants.
Gomes: Mr. Fishbach. Debbie Downer.
Holmes: How poopy were these pants?
Gomes: They were so poopy. Anybody who was there, you’d think that you’re going to get infected. My mentality was; we’re sharing this tiny little shelter, it’s raining, and we’re stuck with poopy pants. I got all hypochondriac for a second there. This guy keeps getting out and (expletive deleted) all around the shelter. Marking his territory. I don’t want this guy to get close to me. I don’t want to be Poopy Pants 2.0. So, I wanted distance. I was serious. I’m not getting sick here, dude. Poopy Pants, go!
Holmes: That why people come here for the hard questions that most people are afraid to ask.
Gomes: (Laughs)

Holmes: Alright, word association time. Let’s start with Vytas.
Gomes: What did Shirin call him? Downward puppy dog?
Holmes: Shirin?
Gomes: Cry me a river.
Holmes: Kimmi?
Gomes: Mom.
Holmes: Wentworth?
Gomes: Idols.
Holmes: Wiglesworth?
Gomes: Hypocrite.
Holmes: Jeff Varner?
Gomes: Jeff Varner, you little bitch.
Holmes: (Laughs) Woo?
Gomes: Woo! Woo! The Woo train! You voted for me twice!
Holmes: Jeremy?
Gomes: I wouldn’t date you either, Scorpio.
Holmes: Tasha?
Gomes: She should have died last night. Oh, God. That sounds so mean. Swimming lessons.
Holmes: Savage?
Gomes: Grow up.
Holmes: Stephen?
Gomes: Poopy pants! That’s the first thing that came to mind.
Holmes: That’s the goal. Terry Dietz?
Gomes: Dad. Astrology, star, airplane.
Holmes: Joe?
Gomes: Moldy clown.
Holmes: Kass?
Gomes: Kassanova!
Holmes: Ciera?
Gomes: You can borrow my clothes any time, sister.
Holmes: Keith?
Gomes: Golly!
Holmes: Spencer?
Gomes: I’m not really a fan of Spencer right now. Spencer can go die in a fire.
Holmes: Let’s finish with Peih-Gee.
Gomes: Die in a fire as well. I’ve tried to apologize to that chick so many times and she continues to hate on me on social media. I just don’t have time for it. Go away.

Holmes: You made fun of Joe’s hair…
Gomes: (Laughs) Come on, Gordon! You’re being so sensitive about his moldy, clown hair! Please. We actually have similar hair, but I’m not a clown.
Holmes: I heard that you got some heat on social media due to your comments.
Gomes: Isn’t that insane? I think that half of the hormonal teenage girls are sensitive about Joe’s hair. So, hopefully when he cuts his goldilocks I can get a piece of it and put it in a zip-lock bag and call a truce. But it’s a very sensitive subject.
Holmes: I made a joke about being the one to put your bracelet in Peih-Gee’s bag.
Gomes: (Laughs)
Holmes: And I got comments like, “You die and you rot in hell, Gordon Holmes!”
Gomes: Oh my God. It’s a joke people! People love to hate me. Welcome to my world.

Any Questions? Drop me a line on Twitter: @gordonholmes

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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